Motherhood

1. According to Hays, what were the four historical stages of development in the cultural notions of appropriate mothering in America in 17-20th centuries? What is intensive mothering, and does this concept apply to your mother or mothers of your friends?
According to Hays, there were four historical stages of development in the cultural notions of appropriate mothering in America between the 17th and 20th century.
The first stage was the Puritan stage and occurred between the late 17th and early 18th century in which children were brought up with strict religious values and rules. They learned to base every aspect of life on religion and were obedient to their parents. This stage was followed by an era that focused on nuturance as main importance in mothering and childrearing. Children were born pure and were raised by their mothers into model citizens. This, in turn, placed great importance on the mother because they were the only individual who could perform the job with precision. In the 19th century the third stage occurred in which the mother hired help, such as a nurse, to take care of the child. However, not all mothers could afford this and were required to take on this task themselves. The nurse would raise the child under supervision of the mother and receive love and care from a woman who is not their biological mother. In the last stage, childrearing was thought to be the result of science. This stage was called the Progressive stage and many manuals were used to raise children. Additionally, children were given higher values and recognized as independents.
Intensive mothering "tells us that children are innocent and priceless, that their rearing should be carried out primarily by individual mothers and that it should be centered on children's needs, with methods that are informed by experts, labor intensive, and costly" (21). My mother somewhat embodies intensive mothering because she values my siblings and I before anything else and would do absolutely anything for us. However, she also values my father and would not feel as though childrearing would be complete without his love and support. I feel as though their combined love and care has developed my sisters, brother, and I into well-rounded and immensely cared for individuals. In addition, my mother realizes the importance of advice from professionals in the healthcare business but highly values the advice from her own mother, father, and siblings in childrearing.
2. In Crittenden's view, what are the main indicators that mothering is devalued in the United States? Do you agree with her?
Main indicators that motherhood is devalued in the United States is seen in the interaction between housewives and society. They believe that a woman who stays at home with her children does nothing and that they are wasting their time. Economists believe that a woman's income and leisure atrophy when they are housewives. Women in the workworld who have children may not be hired because of this fact or may be asked to decrease their hours. Additionally, "mothers in forty- seven of the fifty states,...,do not have unequivocal legal right to half of their family's asset," (6) and these women recieve no ownership to their breadwinner husband's income. Lastly, "government social policies don't even define unpaid care of family dependents at work," (6).
I completely agree with Crittenden's view that stay at home mothers do not receive as much appreciation and grattitude as they should. I agree that there is a gap between the stated appreciation for childrearing, the importance of raising children, and how housewives are treated in society.

3. According to Collins, what are the two types of mothering that Black women tend to do? How are these related to the notion of "motherhood as a symbol of power"?
Collins proposed that Black women tend to do two types of mothering; bloodmothers or othermothers. Bloodmothers are also called biological mothers and in this case the woman cares for her own child. On the other hand, othermothers share the responsibility of caring for the child and is usually done by members of the extended family; including grandmother, aunt, sister, etc.
The two types are related to the notion of "motherhood as a symbol of power" because it reflects unity and strength of the female relationship. It proves support and cooperation in childcare which lead to a sense of power and instills morals and values among family members.

4. According to Edin and Kefalas, what are the poor women's attitudes on and experiences with marriage and childbearing, and what can the society do to help these women get out of poverty? What is your opinion?
Poor women have given up on their ideas of marriage and believe that it is only for women who have stable incomes or of middle or high class. In their eyes, marriage "ought to be reserved for those who can support a 'white picket fence' lifestyle: a mortage on a modest row home, a car and some furniture, some savings in the bank, and enough money left over to pay for a 'decent' wedding" (18). Additionally, these women believe that it is necessary as a women to be economically stable when beginning a marriage in order to enforce equality between the spouses. They believe that this will also prevent their marriage from going bad.
Despite contrary belief, these poor single mothers describe childbearing as something that saved them from their horrible life and preventing them from reaching the bottom of a downward spiral. However, initially having a child with your partner proved a sense of commitment and was perceived as an honor for young women to bear the child of their older partner. The child itself provided the mother with emotional security, "a compelling sense of purpose" (18), and romantic intimacy.
Edin and Kefalas propose that in order to help these women out of poverty it is necessary to provide them with access to financial stability by obtaining jobs. In turn, these women will achieve a sense of hope and belonging in the world.
I completely agree with Edin and Kefalas and believe that everyone should be given the opportunity to support themselves with a career or job. Women, especially those supporting children on their own, should be given the opportunity to provide a substantial life to their family.